Having clarified women's independent spiritual and intellectual status
in Islam, I turn next to their status with regard to men, and their
relationship with men. We are here looking at a relationship of
interdependence. Allah (God) in the Holly Qur'an says:
"Among His signs is (the fact) that He has created spouses for you
from among YOllrselves so that you may console yourselves with them. He has planted
love and mercy between you; in that are signs for people who reflect" (Qur’an 30:21).
This is a very important definition of the relationship between man and
wife. They are expected to find tranquility in each other's company and be
bound together not only by the sexual relationship but by "love and mercy".
Such a description comprises mutual care, consideration, respect and affection.
There are numerous Ahadith (sayings of the prophet), particularly
those narrated by A'isha, which give a clear insight into the way prophet Mohammad (PBUH) treated his wives and the way
they treated him. The most striking thing about these is their evidence of the
mutual care and respect of the marriage relationship. There is no servility on
the part of the wives, and there are probably as many references to the Prophet
doing things to please his wives as there are of the wives doing things to
please the Prophet.
The Holly Qur'an refers to wives generally in another chapter saying:
"They are garments for you while you are garments for them" (Qur’an 2:187).
In other words, as a garment gives warmth, protection and decency, so a
husband and wife offer each other intimacy, comfort and protection from
committing adultery and other offences.
It follows from what has been quoted from the Qur'an that one of the
important aims of Islamic regulations governing behaviour and human relations
is the preservation of the family unit in such a way that the atmosphere of
tranquility, love and mercy and consciousness of God can develop and flower to the
benefit of husband and wife, and also of the children of the marriage.
Therefore in examining the conduct expected of men and women towards
each other, both inside and outside marriage, we have to bear in mind these
aims and weigh their benefits to the individual and to society. We must also bear
in mind that Islam has a coherent view of life, and that the various aspects of
it should not be considered in isolation from each other. It comprises a total
way of life, and each part of it needs to be seen in the total context.
To understand the role of a woman in a Muslim society therefore we have
to examine both her duties and her rights, the behaviour expected of her
towards men and the behaviour due to her from men.
